You bolt out of the house, an arm across your chest (if you are a girl) and a hand over your genitals. You spy across the street a well lit and welcoming Gamestop, a place where they will be so happy to see a real live human being naked that they would not judge you for it. You enter with a feeling of uneasiness and fear. "WELCOME TO GAMESTOP," they say in unison, a motley, three strong troupe of neckbeards and body cheese. "PRE-ORDER SOMETHING. PRE-ORDER EVERYTHING!" "Elvira took my clothes! I NEED A PHONE!" you reply. "HAHAHA, YES. BUT AT A PRICE!" The men emerge from the counter and waddle to your side, grabbing each arm and exposing your bounties to their eyes. They lay you across the counter and clumsily tie you down at your wrists and ankles, laughing amongst each other while gazing upon your flesh like hedonous jackals. Then, wheezing and sweaty, they tattoo a Final Fantasy VII mural across your chest, a poorly drawn image of Cloud and Sephiroth locking blades as the spirit of Aeris watches on in concern. You scream, but to no avail. You have already been defaced. You are already unclean in the eyes of all that is good.
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