Action 52 came out at a time when one game cost an ungodly $50, as opposed to today when you trade oxen for them, ALA Oregon Trail. The goal of this game was to provide not one, but 52 action packed games, each one filled with more whimsey and wonderment than the last. Reading through a GamePro at the age of seven, this caught my eye. $80 for 52 NES games!? Surely this must be too good to be true! Normally only the three richest sultans of the world could afford that. It became my goal to save up the money for Action 52. All summer long, I saved, the amount at the end being $50 or so, a full 30 dollars short. This was the day my childhood died a million times over. This was the day I entered the real world.

Fast forward 10 years, all the way to October 2001. Thanks to NesterDC, I can enjoy many NES games I couldn't before in the comfort of my own room on my Dreamcast. Action 52 is only a memory now, a shadow of the past. Years went by, and all I ever heard were tales of it's incredible lack of quality. Tales I refused to believe. Then, at a sleazebag ROM site, I saw it. The game not even a whole Summer's worth of saving could afford. It was Action 52, and for free! I clicked on the link, tore through the ensuing storm of pop up ads like a machete armed jungle explorer through vines, and at long last, it was mine. I quickly burnt it onto a disc and rushed to my Dreamcast. Expecting an unsupported mapper message, I kept my fingers crossed when I pressed Start on Action 52. It worked!

I think at this point it is important I provide a visual representation of how I felt watching the opening sequence of Action 52. Now, the two cheetah kittens represent the Cheetahman within me. They are playful, oblivious to the ways of the world. Yet, when you look into their eyes, you see the glowing red hunger for not one, not two, but fifty-two action packed adventures. When this hunger is satisfied, the inner Cheetahman will come to flourish. Or so I thought.

This is about as exciting as Sharks gets.It turned out Action 52 was just as awful as all the stories had told. I played one game after another, after another, looking for the golden bar that would be it's salvation. I didn't find the gold bar. I guess Streemers wasn't THAT bad, but imagine paying $80 for it. WHEW!! I think I spent that money on a Huffy that got stolen two days after I bought it. I haven't ridden a bike since then. Apple harvesting was more my speed, anyway.

In the following pages, I will tax my sanity to it's very limits by playing and writing about all 52 games of this dread cartridge. You will literally hear my screams jump out of the webpage and into your ears, and I will accomplish this without using sound files of any kind. That is just how powerful these games are in their lack of quality.

So, kick off your shoes and get ready to walk barefoot into the bowels of gaming hell!

2001-2002 Updates
Edition 1: Non-Human, Streemers
Edition 2: Storm Over Desert, Haunted Halls, Shooting Gallery
Edition 3: City Of Doom, Manchester, Time Warp Tickers
Edition 4: Mash Man, Billy Bob

2006 Updates
Edition 5: The Ooze, Starevil, Slasher, and 5 Positive Things About Action 52
Edition 6: Bubble Gum Rossie, Sombreros, and Unused Bubble Gum Rossie Puns
Edition 7: Illuminator, Evil Empire, Lollipops, and Dear Diary: The Discovery of Action 52
Edition 8: Synonyms For The Word Awful Pt. 1 and What Did I Do To Deserve This?
Edition 9 pt. 1: Synonyms For The Word Awful Pt. 2
Edition 9 pt. 2: The End...?
Edition 9 pt. 3: The Cheetahmen and All's Well That Ends Well

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