yo yo bitzitnchesz wutz up itz me killdoza and i hav a storEW to teal abot the annual deth bike turnamintz they hold everE yeer at tha local A & W driv in itz hardcore up tha wazoo.

so thear i wuz at the bike race on my dope aas schwinn bike that i call thunder bike becuz one time it got hit bey thunder and than aftar that i ran ouitside an wuz like awsome i hope it fliez and than i got electricutsed becuz the bike was still brimming with thundar enreagy and itstill iz to this day i think mabe LOL

so NEwayz i wuz competeng in tah turnamint and than three time champion CHET AUSTIN ridez up in his wennie BMX bike that his dad bot him and the only reason he winz all the tyme iz bcuz the bike goez faster if ur a wener who watchez felcitiy like cheat austin. LOL cheat austin im a genieus so i sez to chet hay shitnose this is the yeer u go down and hez like please dont hurt me killdozer ill give you anything i just want to go home and watch felicity and i wuz like hahaha what a pansey and he wuz like boo hoo hoo im building up so much wiener energy that i will win for sure! and then it was on so tha race startz and i wuz pedaling my life away and pedling so hard that sparkz started to fly but CHET AUSTIN is such a failure that hiz bike was moving fast! but i had a plan that would make me sure to win so i pedalez fast so i could cathc up with chet austin andz than i put ted howard on the bike and it built up so muc failur energey that the bike explodesd and they just held eachother in tha midle of tha stret crying and sayin how awful now we'll miss felicity for sure it wuz HILarious so than i pedaled fast nd hard with tha force of thunadar and slim jimz to the finish line and than the A&W ownar came out to tha winnerz circle and ted and chet wear in tha second and thrid places lookin lik todal posers and he wuz like wear iz tha victor wear iz brave killdozer? but where wuz I? uppercuting a waterfall, thatz wear.