City Of Doom

City of Doom is what I think a regular city, made into the City of Doom due to the fact some guy in a HIDEOUS color choice of a lime green top and magenta capri pants takes it upon himself to climb up buildings with nothing more than his bare hands and an unparalleled appreciation of the movie City Of Angels. He climbs up the building because he is upset over the ending (SPOILER Meg Ryan dies SPOILER!) and destroys anything that will get in his way. Windows are deadly to touch, just like in real life, making this the most realistic game ever released. And at the top, there is a Phoenix beast you must fight. I had trouble aiming my attacks, so I assume when you beat the game, the ending of City Of Angels changes from a frowner to a star studded Circus, featuring Dustin Diamond (Saved By The Bell's Screech) as the Chess Magician. What a show!


Manchester is a middle finger in the face of every goth kid who ever played a video game. Fitting the words "Man" and "Chest" into one fantastic title, this is indeed a burly romp through the world of music, the likes of which has never been seen before. Manchester brings it's own unique and low quality perks to the Action 52 table: Jumping changes the music, leading me to believe Manchester is some sort of Rock & Roll star, and punching in mid air causes you to float as long as you're still pumping those fists, an ability only possesed by three people in this world: Nelson Mandela, Chuck Norris and MANCHESTER.

There are a bevy of great monsters, like fireballs and medusa things. As well as more fireballs and medusa things. That's all I saw. The fireballs are easy to avoid, since as long as you're punching you'll float above them like a breeze. The musical notes represent the pain Manchester feels as an artist. All in all, Manchester is a macho headgame for some people and a waste of time for most others.

Time Warp Tickers

If you've ever dreamed that 80's modern art would become a video game, then Time Warp Tickers is the realization of that dream. Unfortunately, that dream soon becomes a nightmare, as you become trapped in one of the worst games on Action 52.

The world of Time Warp Tickers is a topsy turvy wonderland, where down is up and up is left, and flowers bloom bowling balls. Plus, you play as fingers. FINGERS. One time I was at Ozzfest and they played a game with my fingers. It was Cat's Cradle. Ozzy Osborune himself later came out, bought me a candy apple, and went through the ball crawl with me. Innocent reminders of a time before Action 52.

When you die in this game, text with the word "Time?" appears rather than the typical explosion or whatever. This also happens when you kill an enemy. I think this was their attempt to be deep. Well, it worked, sirs. It got me thinking, is there really time, or is it all just one large spanning moment that only seems much longer than it actually is? Has our time already passed, and are we only catching up to death? All questions I quickly forgot when I saw Renagade with Lorenzo Lamas was on TV. He kicks and rides a motorcycle. Sweet!

This is what I picture the music video for Putting On The Ritz looking like. I bet I'm right too.

On to more Action 52 games!

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